Treasure Island: An Audible Original Drama
By: Robert Louis Stevenson / Adapted By: Marty Ross / Narrated By: Philip Glenister, Daniel Mays, Catherine Tate, Owen Teale
Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
A Jolly Jaunt, but yikes! a True Undertaking…
This is what a git I am about Classics: We were assigned Kidnapped by Robert Louis Stevenson in 9th grade, and I oh well, I oh gosh, did NOT read it but fudged my way to a 94 on the exam.
Just could NOT get into it, and even saying I was sick so that I might cram m’ way through it had me doing crosswords and word jumbles in bed instead (Uhm, thanks Mom, for calling me in…).
Still, this is a Week O’ Pirates, and how can I NOT do Treasure Island?!? I mean, >Aaaaarrrgh, matey!< and all that, right?!
Okay, so! not quite 6 1/2-hours… took me THREE DAYS!!!
It’s not that I didn’t like it; it’s not like I was bored. It’s more that, yikes! this production Meant Business! But first:
Young Jim Hawkins works with his Mum and Dad at the Admiral Benbow Inn, his dad’s place. He dreams of doing more than being tethered to work work work there, and he looks longingly at the sea. When a drunken sot of a man, a sea captain by the name of Billy Bones ups and dies there, riffling through his belongings (Bones kinda sorta swilled all the rum in the place and paid nary a piece o’ silver this whole time), Jim and his Mum find a map. Not just any map but one with a big ol’ X Marking The Spot.
Treasure!!!
Mum is tied to the Inn, but Jim hotfoots it outta there to join Dr. Livesey and Squire Trelawney, two genteel men who suddenly decide that they are Adventurers Extraordinaire. Jim will be a cabin boy, and the Dr. and Squire will be the hotshots in charge. Hiring a ship is one thing, but a crew? The hotshots meet a one-legged seaman who goes by the name of Long John Silver (Complete with jabbering parrot sitting atop his shoulder), and Silver just haaaappens to know of several worthy men to complete the crew. And so they’re off and away.
And so things appear all hunky dory, but whilst Jim inexPLICably winds up in an empty apple barrel, he overhears Silver and another of the crew talking Mutiny and Murder of the Dr. and the Squire, and of Theft of the Treasure. This, Jim imMEDiately relays, but there’s only so much that can be done. Then once on the island? All Holy HELL breaks loose, and soon Jim is off on his own, has plans, attempts feats of derring-do, and even? Can he take a life if his own is in jeopardy?
This all winds up sooo very action-packed, and ultimately is a tale that ponders good vs. evil, and how much does any man have of BOTH within him?
-BUT- that threeee daaaays!
Because this entire production MUST be listened to at x1 speed, and y’all know that THAT? well, it’s not m’ style at ALL. But I was left with no choice as the narrators are seasoned performers, consummate actors, and the accents flew right and left, thick as you please. If I wanted to GET what was being said? Oh lo, nooo speeding up listening speed. Then too, there are sound effects galore, so when all hits the fan, there are whooooshes of cutlasses swinging out, seeking a head to lop off; and there are the Ka-BAMS of pistols going off. Throw in island and sea sounds, and dear Accomplice, ya got waaaay more than an earful or two to contend with. Verrry well done, but yikes! do I really wanna spend sooo much time and effort to suss things out in the most basic of ways?
I do NOT.
But I DID.
And I was mightily entertained, complete with feeling my heart starting to a-hammer away as pirates sought to roust our protagonists from safe places, as pirates came at Jim with wickedly sharp daggers, as Silver became One Simply Did NOT Know What. I was verrry keen to know what would happen, and I applaud Stevenson for making this rousing adventure tale a morality question at the same time: What is good and just; and what makes a pirate? Choices or Actions?
So very glad to have this under my belt, and tho’ I whinge and moan, I’m very glad I had the threeee daaaays to devote to it.
And as far as the Kidnapped Fiasco? Uhm, sorry Mrs. Bryson… thanks for the 94…
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