Joy Enough: A Memoir
Written and Narrated By: Sarah McColl
Length: 4 hrs and 40 mins
The death of a mom; the death of a young marriage
Okay so, like, of COURSE I think the Publisher’s Summary is a trifle misleading. I thought Joy Enough was going to be about author Sarah McColl’s memories of her larger-than-life mother and a contemplation of dying and death. That she dropped everything and tended to her mother and came to a few sweetly-soft, and even more hard-hitting truths.
Uhm, a bit, and those parts I liked, but not really the whole thing. Joy Enough is certainly an appropriate listen for daughters and mothers who want to contemplate the bond, but it’s also appropriate for women, young women, who want to hear about the dissolution of a relationship. Expect a lot on a marriage that goes south. I mean, a LOT. As in: I really don’t see how she could’ve told us any more than she did and NOT call it a divorce book. Cuz see, it’s not like she dropped everything: Everything dropped her.
But let’s get back to the book, and I’ll stop grousing and splitting hairs, shall I? McColl’s mother’s been through the whole cancer thing before, but this time the cancer’s spread and things aren’t looking good. McColl cares for her some on weekends, cooking tempting meals, and trying to halt the decay of the house her mother is dying in. Along the way, she remembers her mother, a vibrant woman who teaches her daughter that: Feeling is living. Sarah and Allison (Mom) are very much alike, and through the narrative we see just how much Mom taught Sarah how to reframe her feelings, her scattered thoughts, how to put them into a neat and poetical order that made sense. It certainly does showcase Mom as a creative woman who knew exactly the right words to say to young Sarah. And judging from the glowing reviews the book has received, such reframing resonated for many readers/listeners.
I dunno. I mean, even if I was okay with the ENDless discussions of Sarah’s increasingly unhappy marriage, I believe I still wouldn’t have liked the book as much as everybody else appears to. To me, it all reads like essays for a Creative Writing class, rather jumbled, and ouch! Soooo hyper emotional and even melodramatic. I just kept losing patience with McColl which I kinda feel bad about. I too am a rather hyper emotional person, so you’d think I’d cut her some slack with her histrionics when her mother died, cut her some slack as she absolutely wallowed in her misery regarding her marriage. But I kinda felt it was just a tad too self-indulgent. Mom taught her how to feel and feel BIG; but she never taught her about boundaries, never taught her that being so needy comes off as unappealing. And when she, still married, hops in the sack with some other guy, just so she can look into someone’s eyes, I totally lost respect for her. End it first, sweetpea, THEN find yourself in another man. Cuz you know you’re not feeling whole unless you’ve got a man there, right?
Harsh? Too harsh? Well, since I’m kinda on a roll, I’ll add this: Her voice. Yikes… I really thought I was listening to a 10-year old, which was all well and good when she was conveying memories of being ten and all precocious and wanting to study Philosophy. But it wasn’t so great when she’s all grown up and neeeeding intimacy and weeping in the marriage counselor’s office: She just sounds whiny and miserable. Her voice kinda grew on me, but still…
So I think this definitely goes into our Season of Grief selection of audiobooks, but it didn’t have the weight or depth I thought it would. And I think this definitely goes into our Valentine’s Day selection for those who are single on said holiday and want to hear that they too can survive it.
It just woulda been nice if the Publisher’s Summary pointed out that this was a book on both…
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