Autumn Skies over Ruby Falls
By: Holly Martin / Narrated By: Penny Andrews
Length: 7 hrs
Uninspiring characters, shallow plot, AND twittery narration? Egad, how annoyed can I be?
First off, I wasn’t even onto the second sentence before I was annoyed and wondering if I’d be able to do the whole audiobook. Actually, that’s not the thing as I reFUse to review something without having finished the whole story (I haaaaate it when I come across reviewers who say: I hated it but I never finished it, so dunno, maybe it got better). Still, I was feeling all woebegone, but I sallied forth as I looked down to my phone and saw that Autumn Skies over Ruby Falls would be only 7 hours… of perhaps wanting to jam an ice pick into my ears.
Cuz see, from the get-go, one can heeeeear the smiiiiiile in narrator Penny Andrews’s voice; she’s just so gosh darned jaunty and chipper, and it feels like I’m a 50+ year old woman listening to somebody oh so happily relaying a story to a group of hard-up gals. And don’t even get me started on the voice she uses for our heroine, Clover (Clover!). Okay you got me started on the voice she uses for Clover (Clover!): It’s all twittery and lispy, so right away she comes off as a feckless airhead.
And then one realizes that author Holly Martin wrote Clover as… a feckless airhead. So as I waded in deeper into this story which is firmly in the realm of chick lit and not the more generous term of Women’s Literature.
What all makes it chick lit? Well, let’s give ya the story:
Clover, a dance teacher at the hotel she co-owns with her sisters Skye (Skye!) and Aria (Aria!) and investor and hotel mogul Noah, has just heard from good friend and sparks-just-fly-when-we-talk heartthrob Angel Mazzeo. She’s all… twittery… that he’ll soon be visiting and is all… twittery… that maybe she can ask him to be her date to the Autumn party the hotel throws. But “date” isn’t a good word as she’s not into dating—she has a betrayal in her past, and she’s all woooounded and all feeeeeearful.
So the chick lit biz is front and center right from the first. Wan creature with scars to the soul but who still manages to feel a trifle horny, but! it might be too much! can she get past her past! will this man be able to tear down her walls!
And then the chick lit biz goes full steam ahead when we meet Angel who will be staying at Clover’s house (No room at the inn), and we come to find that he’s nothing if not totally into talking about their relationship (Dunno ‘bout you, but my experience is that men haaaate that… but maybe that’s just me?). Not only does he wanna talk about where it’s all going, he’s totally into just cuddling and sleeping together in the same bed without sex involved. See, they’ve come to the decision that neither of them wants anything serious: He because he’s a globetrotting man about town; she because she’s all wooooounded and all feeeearful, so the kissing and holding each other is just a-okay (chick lit! chick lit!).
Naturally things progress, and plenty of sex is involved. So much sex that, no my toes did NOT curl, but gosh yes, I got bored. And do I even have to say that Clover winds up sharing the pain from her past? With her two sisters staunchly and loyally backing her up? And Noah (Who’s most CERtainly a dude) making a job offer that challenges their instant Uber-relationship and then backs off because wait: How CAN he do that, offering a job to a man who might be in love?
This is not the only Holly Martin I have in my Library, and it’s not the only Penny Andrews narration in there either. I keep getting taken in by the cozy covers, and I THOUGHT Penny Andrews was familiar to me, but now I’m all fearful of dipping into what I have in said Library (I also keep getting the audiobooks ultra cheap via kindle Whispersync!). What worries me is that there’s not much of a plot in here, and there’s so much contemplation and bearing of souls re: relationships (And come to think about it, I’M not that keen about yakking about relationships any more than a “man” might be…!) that I’m feeling rather wary that all the other audiobooks will be all fraught with “feelings” also.
Twittery Clover (Clover!), vocal gyrations for all the other characters (I swear for one character, Andrews is narrating and pinching a nostril closed to get a nasal twang!), and a Hero who, no really, he WANTS to talk about his feelings, and gosh darn it, what is it about THIS woman (Who might I say is… twittery) that makes him WANNA be faithful for the rest of his life?
May I suggest: It’s too much I tell you, too much. I dooo applaud that Martin did make this Season-centered (The hotel is gearing up for Halloween after all!) rather than just a gimmick title to add to a series. So I DID feel the coming of Autumn.
So there’s that.
But oh gosh golly gosh darn. There’s just sooooo much more, and narration that had me rifling through the junk drawer, cuz there HAD to be an ice pick in there somewhere!
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